Well it sure has been a while since I blogged. I really don't have the time as of late to be doing this. But I will try better to post more.

Life has been OK I suppose. Been quiet stressed as of late. But on the upside Barb and myself are working on our friendship. I think its going pretty good. Hopefully sometime down the road we could get back together. God says its not time for us. And this time I'm not going to disobey god. I did the first time and it ended in tragedy. Well nothing like big bang boom fight. But it ended on a wrong note.

I'm also going to be moving out on my own. Which I'm deathly afraid of being on my own. This made me very depressed for a few days. At that point I was ignoring god. I've been a little upset with things and have been taking it out on everyone and god as well. I kinda screwed up with a lot of people. So I feel alone in it all. But do you know whats weird? Every time I have a problem Paul (my roommate) gives me advise. And it was funny cause last time he talked about it and then we went to church and the pastor(Brian) preached on the exact same thing :|. How weird is that... Well I know god works in odd ways. Maybe hes trying to get my attention.. But I've been depressed like I said so I prayed about me having to go out on my own in August. And its also funny to because Brian said this verse at church on Sunday. But that came to me while I was praying.

Luke 12: 22-28

Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith.

But I can't say I'm not scared. But lets just say I'm not as scared, I feel a little comfort at this point. But probably when it gets closer to August I will be so scared :|. But we will see how God provides for my needs. I probably really need to learn from example. I think that's how most of us learn.

I've been quiet busy with work lately too. Well not as busy as you might think. I would really like to be pulling 100/hrs a week. But they won't let me work any overtime right now. And life is surly going to be hard living on my own. I'm always broke :|. But I only work 70/hrs bi-weekly. I need 80 or more to survive. Its going to be defiantly hard to get by. I'm really saving my money hardcore right now though to hopefully be able to get some stuff I need. Also with the holiday with stat pay coming up I will get to work for Double time and a half. So that will be nice. Plus my birthday is coming up on July 20 TH. Hopefully if anyone gives me anything it will be money. Money will be good to help me get stuff. I've already got someone offering me a bed and a desk which is guaranteed. Someone from work for a microwave, and plates. And another from work for a rocking chair. Who knows if they're serious though. I really hope I can find a place for cheap 350-425$/month or so with utility's included. I really don't want to rent a room this time around (I had lived with a drunk for almost a yr, defiantly not something I want to do again). Or maybe I can get another roommate. Maybe someone from Church, Who knows. But I'm also so confused, scared all at the same time its kinda weird.

I really hope my mom and dad will come see me for my birthday. That would be fun. Although they live in Seattle, WA. Long ways away. I also hope I can get my computer before or soon after I move out. My mom has had it almost a year now :|.

Well I probably should stop here.. I hope everything is well for everyone.