Wow it sure has been a while since I've posted on my blog. I've been meaning to post so many times. Life is so busy, Its crazy. I've had a lot of things on my mind as of late. To many to name in fact. I've been really good lately though. Being strong and happy for the most part. I've been thinking about my life and what I can do to make myself a better person. I am now tithing which is good.. Its really a challenge for me though. I hope I can keep it up. I'm sure I will but its a difficult thing for me to do. But then it makes me think on a verse where god says "Challenge me on this". So thats what I'm doing. My faith is strong all over though.

But I've also been thinking about the fact of the whole GOD thing. We as people are very un-thankful. For the most part, most people just turn to god for when someone is sick, or dieing, or even a marriage. We don't put god first, We are people of material possessions. And you know I've leaned a lot about our selfishness since I basically just have my clothes and a few DVDS. compare to my old life style where I had a lot, to have so few you see your own misgiving's. Your own burdens. We as people need to start putting god first. Now I'm not prophet or a person who is perfect. I stumble all the time. And even I need to learn this valuable lesson as well. But I'm learning and I feel very strong in my faith of god. I really do. I feel the best I have in many years. I feel free of the bondage that has kept me down for over 5 years. I no longer live with panic attacks which makes me happy.

I've also been thinking of Barb a lot too! I miss "US". But I also see where we are probably not made for everyone. I'm afraid of being alone. And afraid of being with someone. Its a Catch 22. I also really want to be a father before I die. This is my passion. But don't worry I'm not planning kids anytime soon. But I know this is a big thing for me and this is really what I want in life, and of course be pleasing to god :). I also feel that something REALLY big is about to happen at my church. God has been showing us so many good things and telling us stuff. Its going to be big whatever it is. I just don't know what it is :|.

I've also been working hard at work and at home. I've been kicking the bucket and working hardcore on Math. This is so I can go take my G.E.D. Tests(exams). This is more a self confidence thing for me. But I also want to full fill my dreams and become a game developer. Who knows if I will ever get their. I hope I will be able too!

On a quick note. I have uploaded new pictures of the Silent Hill Set.

Got to run

Well this week has been pretty good. I'm so confused. I don't know what to do with Barb. I'm not sure if I should try and re-establish a relationship with her. Or just let it be. People talk bad about her at work too. Which I don't like. I'm not going to go into details on what about. But I was thinking, Maybe she is the one for me and its worth trying to get the relationship back on track. And its just Satan's way on trying to get me not to follow through. But then I think shes so hard headed at times. Its her way or no way. And that bugs me too! So I'm in a Catch 22 right now and I really don't know what to do on that matter.

I was on the bus tonight. And I had god speak to me. He said "A Man who has nothing, But gives, Is a man who is blessed". At this time when he said it a man had no money for the bus. So I paid my last 2 dollars so he had a ride home. I know its only $2. But I understand that concept. I'm utterly in the Negative in my bank account and that was my last money. But hey it was for something good and I think god wanted me to help this man. So I did.

I also have been having good stuff happen at church. I've lost it 2 weeks in a row where god has touched me. Its really ironic for me. I've taken so many leaps of Faith in this past month. I've tithed faithfully and also donated extra. Maybe a little to much though as I'm dead broke now. But I feel good because I have sowed seed into a ministry that I support 100%. And that makes me happy.

I'm still growing my hair. My bangs are past my nose now. UGH! I need to get it layered and trimmed. Hopefully next Friday when I get paid I can get it at least trimmed. And hopefully I can save some money this time around too!

Well I should probably go! God bless everyone! Be Safe!